Wanting to be needed
by totem
Summary: Some prople want and need to be loved. Phoebe has a family that love her, but still she feels lost and alone. Will she ever truely find a guy who will love her and respect her? Or will that guy be somone a little to close to home?
1. chapter 1 insecurity

**Okay wanting something is not all that uncommon. I know that at one point everyone wants something, be it a simple something, or something much greater. Some I know wish for a hell of a lot more than a person can give. But some ask only for a mere something**

**Some only ask for love, and appreciation, some to be acknowledged by a person and be respected.**

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**Prue 24 – married – Andy 24**

**Luke 5 (Andy and Prue) **

**Piper 22 – boyfriend - Rob 23**

**Phoebe 19 **

**Paige 18 – boyfriend - Chris Perry -19**

All live in the manor accept Rob, and chris but they are around a lot.

Piper works at P3

Prue at 415

Andy is an inspector at the SFPD

There basically the same old characters accept for Chris, He is not Pipers son, he is just some guy that Paige and Phoebe are friends with.

Well Paige is a little more than friends with him.

NO MAGIC

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**chapter 1 - Insecurity**

**September 12, 2004**

The night was still, you know the still ness that I am talking about. The hot muggy night, nothing much in way of anything is happening. Prue never did like this kind of night because something, always no exception has always broke the stillness.

She stood in the doorway of her son's room looking over the bed where her sleeping son lay. She was in deep thought, worried about her family. Andy out there somewhere in god knows what kind of situation, Piper down stairs with Rob, something between them was off she could tell. And then there was Phoebe and Paige when was she not worried about them, her babies. Then there was this little fellow, her soldier. My little man is what she'd call himâ€and Jesus she feared so much with this guy. Was she good enough that was something that she would continuously ask herself? What if she wasn't up to been a mom? For five years now, day after day she had asked that question but she never did find the answer.

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"Piper is something wrong?" His voice cut through her thoughts, the voice that she loved, straight from the man she loved. She looked over at him, his face so loving his eyes filled with concern. He was hansom yet dirty charm about him. Dirty blond hair flopped over his face, his blue eyes held a lot of emotion. He had a past, and he had a heart.

Piper moved closer to him, he moved his arm around her neck and she rested her head on his shoulder she took hold of his hand and he rested the hand around her neck on her upper arm. "Feel better?" He asked.

Piper nodded, "A little" She explained, and she didn't really know what was up with her. She just had a feeling. "Rob, us, me and you we're okay, right?"

Rob was a little taken aback, something was off with Piper tonight and this confirmed hi suspicions. "Piper, I love you so much, why wouldn't we be?" Piper shrugged, "What's wrong Pipe. Babe has something happened?"

Piper held onto his hands a little tighter, "I justâ€I feel a bitâ€I don't know Rob it just feels like, something isn't right"

"Between us?" He asked getting extremely worried.

Piper picked up on his fear and answered quickly, "No, I general. I mean Rob I love you so much. It's just I have a wired feeling like something is wrong with someone in my family. I just wanted to make sure it wasn't you. That you weren't upset or something"

"Piper look at me" He ordered, she did, "Do I look like I want to be anywhere else right now. Or be holding someone else? I love you. And us, right now we are doing good. Don't think any different." Piper nodded and he lent forward placing a kiss on her lips softly. She closed her eyes and relished in his comfort and security. Now that she knew herself and Rob were okay, she felt a little better but there was still somethingâ€something was off tonight. And something big was going to happen. Of this she could be sure.

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"Chris look just tell me what is wrong." Paige wanted to know, Chris was been off with her something was wrong but he was been his same irrational self. "Look Chris, talk to me would you. Has something happened?"

Chris looked at Paige, he loved her so much but his problem was that he had trouble showing it, a lot of trouble. He had to admit at times he envied what Paige had, the family that loved her, he could only wish for that. He stood up from the bench that they were sat on, and took a few paces forward. Paige was totally confused. As she watched his back she noticed him stop, then turn around. The moonlight caught his face and she saw something, PAIN.

She stood to her feet, "Chris"

He looked at her, his girlfriend, one of his two best friends the only person that loved him. "Paige, I don't know what to do anymore. Everything's just" he stopped

Paige walked forward and grabbed his shirt, "Talk to me Chris now!" She said firmly, he looked into her eyes.

"I love you Paige" he said, "you know that right?"

Paige lifted her hand up to his face she cupped his cheek, "Hay, where's this coming from" Something was wrong with him.

"I do not want to lose you Paige" HE admitted as he took one of Paige's hands.

"Hay Chrisâ€you are not going to lose me! Everâ€I love you. And I'm not sure of much but I'm sure of that. Me and youâ€You will NOT lose me" Chris put his arm around Paige and pulled her close, "What brought this on?" She asked.

"I got a letter today. It was fromâ€my dad." He explained, putting is hand into his pocket he pulled out an envelope and handed it to Paige. Paige looked at the letter then opened it slowly. She began to read.

**Chris,**

**Things are not going to get better, after your mom died you and I both know that there was nothing keeping me at home. It's for your own good, not having me around. I just wanted to let you know that I'm selling the house. You need to get out of there by Friday 22nd July.**

**Do not make this any harder than it is already. And after that Date do not try and make contact with my self or Jack, your brother needs a new start. Neither of us need you and your mess around us. **

**I'll call before Friday; make sure that you got the letter. After that, you will never have any reason to contact me again.**

**Frank**

Paige was speechless, she looked up into Chris's eye's they were filled with tears. "Iâ€Chris, I'm soâ€sâ€sorry" She managed she put her arms around him and he around her they held each other, tight. Paige giving Chris the support he needed and Chris giving Paige what she needed, reassurance that he was still here. She couldn't let him lose it.

Tonight Chris had told his girlfriend that his Dad had practically thrown him out of his life. He felt a sence of need, need to be held. So that's what she did, she held him. They walked back to his car and once sat in it, he let the tears fall, Paige was there for him, like she always had been and always would. She took his hand, "I love you Chris" She spoke. HE needed to hear that, Reassurance that someone loved him, he needed itâ€so bad.

"Come on, I'm gonna drive" Paige said after half hour of silence.

"Drive where?" HE asked,

"Home" She explained,

Chris shook his head, "I have no home Paige, it's over. I have nothing"

"Chris you have me, and you always will. Phoebe, you know she'll always be around. And Chris you have a home. With me" Paige was now sat behind the wheel, he was close to her though, sat not far as he needed the comfort.

"I;m sorry" He spoke, "About it all"

"You have nothing to be sorry about, it's fine. I'm here for you"


	2. chapter 2 Don't do anything stupid

**Chapter 2 – Don't do anything stupid**

Prue walked down the stairs and into the living room, she saw Rob and Piper, "Hay guys" She spoke. Her little sis in the arms of a man who Prue considered a brother, she was sure that they were okay now and for that she was happy.

"Hay Prue" Both Rob and Piper said at the same time. "How's Luke?" Piper continued

"He's sleeping I just looked in on him. Hay have you hared from Phoebe or Paige?" Prue asked, as she looked over at the Phone.

"Nope why?" Piper asked,

"Just, worried. Something feels off" She explained.

"You too?" Piper asked, "I think that you should give them a call" Prue nodded, "Phoebe or Paige?" She asked.

"Well Paige is with Chris so we know she's okay but Phoebe, she is with"

"J she went out with J" Prue explained. Then she lifted up the house phone.

As she began dialing Rob spoke, "She's still with him?"

"Un fortunately" Prue said, then there was a few moments of silence, "Hello, Phoebe?"

"Prue" Phoebe spoke,

Prue was worried, this didn't sound like her phoebe something was off, way off. "is everything okay?"

"Not by a long shot." Phoebe explained

"Are you hurt"

"Only emotionally. Look Prue I have drank a lot, I'm on the verge of depression and I've just lit another cigarette, my packets empty and I need you. Will you come and pick me up?"

"Sure, honey, tell me where you are?" Prue asked,

"I'll be at, the bridge okay" Phoebe explained,

"The bridge. Phoebe, what are you doing there."

"Well I was considering jumping but bottled out. Prue I could really do with your help right now"

"Baby I'm on my way justâ€don't do anything stupid. I'm going to pass you on to Piperâ€you talk to her until I can get to you okay" There was no answer, "Phoebe!"

"Prue I'm not doing too good hurry up okay" Phoebe sounded distraught what could have happened to do this to her. "Baby I'm on my wayâ€here talk to Piper" Prue handed Piper the Phone. Piper knew something really bad was going on.

"Baby? Are you there?" Piper asked,

"Pipe I need you Piper" Phoebe sounded so desperate.

"What's wrong Phoebe? Tell me what's up?"

"Piper I'm on some bridge and my heads a wreck, I have drunk a load and I just feeling like crap I could do with a little sisterly support"

"Phoebe look do not do anything stupid okay"

"Why do u keep saying that. I've done something stupid already. I love him"

"Phoebe has J done something to you?" Piper asked fearing the answer,

"We, we had a fight and he" Piper was becoming extremely worried.

"Has he hit you?"

"I don't know Piper. It's all just aâ€ he screamed at me, and I screamed back"

"Prue will be there soon baby. Just hold on okay" She hared Phoebe mumbling something, "Phoebe, stay with meâ€how much have you drunk"

"Too much, way too much. My head's all over the place" Phoebe explained, "He got so angry and he took off. I don't know what happened. It's all just a mess."

"Phoebe has J hit you?"

"Maybe, I don'tâ€I DON'T KNOW ANYMORE!" she screamed in frustration, Piper hated this she felt totally useless.

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Prue pulled her car up to the side of the road, jumping out she called to the loan figure that was stood on the side of the bridge, "Phoebe"

The figure turned around and saw her big sister, "Prue" She spoke, Prue felt a great deal of relief hit her, she ran over to her baby sister and threw her arms around her, Phoebe did the same, "Thank you" Phoebe said as she rested her head in her sisters shoulder.

"Baby, what's wrong" Prue questioned as she pulled back from the hug she noticed a huge darkened shade around Phoebe's eye and her lip split, her shirt bloodied and her hands shaking. "Shit, he hit you. Phoebe, J fucking hit you" Phoebe was having trouble standing and when she stepped back she felt her legs buckle. Prue caught her and managed to take all of Phoebe's wait taking her back to the car. She placed her in the seat and shut the door, walking around to the other side she got in.

"â€Prue, I loved him" Was all that she could say.

Prue pulled her sister into a hug, "I'm so, so sorry baby" That was all that she could offer, words until she got her hands on J that was.


	3. chapter 3 unsure

**Hay CC** thanks so much for the support. Knowing that you are reading this helps me write. I'll have some more **OH BROTHER** up for you soon. Thanks and keep the reviews, thoughts and comments coming. They make totem Happy.

And also thanks to those who are reading and not reviewing. If anyone at all has a question just send it my way and I'll do my best to answer. Anyway on with the fic. Thanks again totem

**Chapter 3 - unsure **

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_**13th September 2004**_  
  
Paige was lying in her bed thinking about the previous night, she was turned on her side looking a Chris's sleeping form. He looked content, in that moment at that time he looked content. She put her and on his face, and moved closer to him. He opened his eyes slowly.  
  
"Morning" she said,  
  
"Is it?" Chris asked, Paige kissed his lips, he complied and kissed her back, "yes it is" Chris smiled as she pulled back, "To what do I owe this to?" He asked  
  
"I just love you Chris. You know that right?" Paige asked, Chris smiled and cuddled close to his girlfriend, wrapping an arm around her stomach and an arm around her neck she rested her head on his bear, muscular chest.  
  
"I'm sorry about last night Paige, I shouldn't have put you threw that." He explained,  
  
"Hay Dude, I'm your girlfriendâ€you can put me through what ever you like as long as you don't shut me out. I couldn't deal with that Chris. I'll always love you"  
  
Love was something Chris was not good at, the showing of emotionâ€he didn't know how to do it. "I, love you too Paige, buti'm still sorry about the neurotic, mad man act last night."  
  
"Do not apologies, look do you want to talk about it?" She asked,  
  
Chris lent over her, propping himself up on his elbow, "not right now, I think that I want to show my girlfriend just how much I love her."  
  
Paige smiled, "Chris I don't need you to show me, I already know"  
  
Chris lent forward an kissed her on the lips she stopped talking as he showed her just what she meant to him, Paige closed her eyes and wrapped her arms around him, he pulled back, "I love you" He said.  
  
"I love you to"  
  
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Luke jumped up from his bed and ran down the corridor, he went flying straight past his parents room that was empty and to the next door. Pushing it open he ran straight in, he jumped up onto the bed. And crawled next to the form that lay on the bed.  
  
"Aunty Phoebe" He called, "Aunty Phoebe"  
  
Phoebe opened her eyes, as the light flooded in she felt like crap. Her head was spinning and her face felt like it had caved in, the night before then replayed. But then his small voice sounded, "Aunty Phoebe" She looked at him and instantly felt better he had a way of doing that.  
  
"Hay Champ" She smiled  
  
Luke lay next to Phoebe and looked instantly saddened, "Aunty Phoebe you got a ouch-y" He said pointing to Phoebe's now bruised face and cut lip.  
  
Phoebe moved her hand towards her face, "Yeah, I do"  
  
"How'd you ouch?" He asked  
  
"I" Phoebe stopped, she refrained from saying something to this five year old that she shouldn't. "Aunty Phoebe had an argument. It was a misunderstanding that's all?"  
  
"Did aunty Paige do it?" Luke asked innocently and he touched the bruised area of his aunts face.  
  
"No Luke, Aunty Paige never did this"  
  
"Aunty Piper?" He asked,  
  
"No, it wasn't Piper honey"  
  
"Mommy?" He tried again,  
  
"No, baby listen to meâ€this is nothing to worry about. You don't worry okay. Aunty Phoebe's okay. She has her Champ with her and one hell of a family. You got that?" Luke nodded, "Good well how about, you go in your room and pick out the cloths you want to ware, I'll get dressed and come help you dress?" Luke nodded and headed off the bed, as he did Phoebe got out of the bed.  
  
As the young infant got to the doorway he stopped and turned around he bounced back to Phoebe and threw his arms around her legsâ€ "Mommy hug-gles me when I got ouch-y, it make you better?"  
  
Phoebe knew there was a reason she loved this guy, he was so sweet and caring. She knelt down, "Thank you champ, you make me feel a lot better. Now go on slugger, go get your clothes" Luke bounced off again.  
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Piper was stood in the kitchen making her breakfast like normal as Prue and Andy sat at the table, Rob was in the fridge getting something. IT was then that Phoebe came down the stairs with a giggling Luke on her shoulders, he was dressed in a pair of jeans, a t-shirt and a base ball cap. Phoebe in her jeans, a shirt, jacket and a pair of boots.  
  
Just as she stepped into the kitchen she felt all of them look at her, Luke stopped laughing as he saw his mom and dad, "Mommy, look Aunty Phoebe gots a ouch-y" He said once again pointing to the large bruise on her face.  
  
Prue stood up, "Morning baby, and I see that Phoebe's hurt. Did my little man look after her." She asked giving Phoebe a sympathetic look, taking Luke from her shoulders and holding him in her arms rested on her hip.  
  
"I did looks after her. She gotten fight's" Prue realized what he meant.  
  
"I know, why don't you go and sit with daddy and get something to eat while I talk with Aunty Phoebe?"  
  
Luke smiled, "Okay. Thanks for da ride-y Phoebe"  
  
Phoebe smiled and tickled her nephew, "No problem slugger. Any time"  
  
Once Luke had once again bounced off Prue looked at her sister, "You okay?" She asked,  
  
"Not really, but considering that I'm not on a cliff and drunk beyond any kind of sense I'm doing better than last night." Phoebe looked at her hands, there was silence before she spoke again, "Thank you"  
  
"What for Phoebe?"  
  
"I last night, I really needed you. And you came if you never god knows what I would have done so thanks"  
  
"Okay, one thing is that I'll always come. You know that and two, were you really going to do it?" Prue was fearing what she was going to hear.  
  
"Do what? Jump?" Phoebe shook her head, "No I didn't have the guts to. Its just a place I go to think. Then after I had drunk so much, things got messy, blurry and I lets just say, you saved me, the state that I was in last night god knows what I would have done"  
  
"You were kind of out of it last night, so what happened?" Prue questioned.  
  
"Can we do this later?" Phoebe asked, "I need some pain meds and some coffee, lot's off coffee."  
  
"Pain meds I can do , and coffee I can do. Take a seat and we will talk Phoebe" Phoebe nodded.  
  
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"What do you mean, you hit her?" A guy screamed,  
  
"Dan, look I was high, drugged up and I lost it with her and started laying into her. Please just go around and see how she is"  
  
"J, this is Phoebe that you are talking about, she is a great mate and you just expect me to what? Stand up for you! You were wrong and way out of line. Don't expect me to fix this one for you. She's a great person and deserves more"  
  
"I was high, I didn't mean to please. I do not want you to fix it, just, see how she is."  
  
Dan stood to his feet, "You better pray she's okay, for your sake this has happened way to many times. And I'm not going to stick up for you J, you did this, no way out of it"  
  
"I'm not asking for a fucking way Dan I just want to know that I never killed her last night. Please" He begged. Dan looked at his friend with disgust and disbelief.  
  
"you really have gone this low by killing the person that you love. That's a new low J, even for you" Dan got up and stormed out of the apartment.  
  
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Paige walked into the kitchen, her hands holding tight onto Chris's as he followed behind, "Morning" She called out to Piper who was the only one stood in it.  
  
"Morning guys, so you sleep well?" She asked,  
  
Chris put his arm around Paige, "Morning, and yup I slept great. You?"  
  
"Can't complain, just a little worried about my family. Including you Chris, are you okay today?"  
  
"I have been better, but I'll get over it. I always do. Thanks" He said as he held Paige closer for the comfort, she complied by resting her head on his chest.  
  
"how's Phoebe holding up?" Paige then asked.  
  
"I'm not too sure she has not spoken much so she's sat in the other room if you want to go and talk to her."  
  
"I'll do that" she said, she turned to Chris, "you coming?"  
  
"No you go ahead maybe it should just be you two. Make sure that she is okay" Paige nodded and kissed him before heading off in Phoebe's direction.  
  
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Paige walked into the living room to see her sister sitting in the corner of the sofa, she looked all of six. "Phoebe?" Piage asked, "Honey are you okay?"  
  
Phoebe looked at her sister, "he ... he hit me" She stammered out.  
  
Paige's heart broke her baby sister was in Pain, and she could do nothing. She walked over and sat next to Phoebe, pulling her sisters head onto her shoulder she rocked her, back and forth stroking her hait, "Oh, honey I'm sorry"  
  
"I love him Paige, I truly did love him" Phoebe spoke again as tears threatened to fall.  
  
"What happened last night, after you left here what did he do to you" Phoebe moved and pushed herself closer into Paige, "Did he do much damage. Or was it just your face?"  
  
Phoebe looked at Paige, "No he, he pushed me against the car door and he" Phoebe closed her eyes as she relived the Pain, "back handed me across the face. I fell to the floor and he, put his boot in me over and over" Phoebe lifted up her shirt and showed Paige her stomach and side. It was a deep shade of crimson, and purple with a touch of grey.  
  
"Fucking hell. Phoebe" Paige was in shock, "He really did this?"  
  
"No Paige I'm fucking making it up" Phoebe shot.  
  
"Sorry wrong thing to say." She lifted her hand up and put a little pressure on the side Phoebe winced, "Has Prue seen these?" She asked.  
  
Phoebe shook her head, "She's got a lot to do with Luke and Andy and her job. I don't want her to worry about me and if she goes after J, he'll kill her. Please don't tell her"  
  
"Okay, I wont." Paige then saw something deep in Phoebe's eyes, "You really did love him. Didn't you. You loved him and he did this to you. I swear to god wait until I get my hands on him"  
  
"No Paige please, don't"  
  
"Well if you won't let me sort him out how can I help you?" Paige asked,  
  
"Just hold me, please Paige I need to be held" Paige pulled Phoebe close, wrapped her arms around her and kissed the top of her sisters head, "I'm sorry I let this happen, I should have been there for you"  
  
"You are Paige, you're here now right where I need you" Phoebe then felt the tears fall, "I truly loved him, that's what is killing me. I gave him who I was Paige everything I had, everything I am. And he killed me last night Been beaten and hit is nothing knew to me I mean Jesus, Dad did it, every guy that I ever went with did it but I just thought J was different. I wanted him to be different"  
  
"I understand Phoebe, really I do. I get that you loved him, but Phoebe please tell me now that you are not going to go back to him. If he did this to you god knows what else he could have done."  
  
"He was high Paige, and you know that I smoke pot, that's nothing new but last night, he shot up in front of me. Smoking, doing pills, powder, I told him I was concerned, and he, he tried to push it away. Act like everything was normal. He started getting really rough and when I told him to get of, he screamed. I screamed back and he hit me. And then he didn't stop until he got back in his car and drove off leaving me on the floor.  
  
"Phoebe, this guy is no good for you, he's the one that got you smoking that shit, he's the one who would fucking have arguments in public, in front of your family. He's a loser. You are better of with out him."  
  
"Maybe!" Phoebe spoke, but she couldn't help the way she felt. She loved him, she truly did.


End file.
